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Rita Rudner Quotes (1953-)
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Explore our curated collection of the most famous and impactful Rita Rudner quotes.
βTo me, life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.β
βMy boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married, and I didn't want him to.β
β[One of my friends] was in labor for 36 hours. (I don't even want to do anything that feels good for 36 hours.)β
βI love being married, I do. It's so great to find that one special person that you want to annoy for the rest of your life.β
βMy husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives.β
βNobody is really happy with what's on their head. People with straight hair want curly, people with curly want straight, and bald people want everyone to be blind.β
βMy husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.β
βI don't even know how this word came into being: "aerobics". I guess gym instructors got together and said, "If we're going to charge ten dollars an hour, we can't call it 'jumping up and down'."β
βEnvy the kangaroo. That pouch setup is extraordinary; the baby crawls out of the womb when it is about two inches long, gets into the pouch, and proceeds to mature. I'd have a baby if it would develop in my handbag.β
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Rita Rudner on Question
Rita Rudner on Ballet
About Rita Rudner
Rita Rudner (born 17 September 1953) is an American comedian and writer.